Ink Girl

Writing makes me feel better.
Here's some of the ideas spinning around in my head,
for a story I'll write some day.

• A ghost pedophile only children can see. Kids start disappearing or showing signs of rape. Who? How? And why is it that there isn't even a fingerprint? (Kinda dark..)
• A coming-of-age story from the perspective of the imaginary friend. She dies in the end, or doesn't. Who knows.
• Daytime Lullaby -- that's the title. It's the same as the title of the song that Caleb-kun wrote for me. He requested it a little over a month ago, that I write down the story of our love life. It's really just depressing. He gets girlfriends, I get boyfriends, he wants me back, and most of the time I leave my boyfriends for him. I wonder how he'd react if I told him I won't do that this time, that I won't leave Garett-kun. Anyway, the nights we spent together, the days we'd go out and not stop smiling. I can't write it when he has his girlfriends though, it's all too sad. And I feel awful writing about the memories when I have Garett-kun. When I'm in those memories, I'm in love with Caleb. I won't go into them when I have Garett-kun, not until I'm ready.
• I feel like I should write the story of Eppie-chan, about how I came to be surrounded by older people who love me and I love them. Maybe it'll be a short story. Maybe a collection of poems. But definitely happiness. Maybe I'll give it to them on the day of my graduation from high school.
• Have you ever wondered if there were a world of math? That maybe squares wanted to be rectangles and couldn't be? That lines want to be parabolas and there was a giant math war? I wondered that. And one day I may even write about it.
• I know I'll want to write and illustrate a children's book. Something simple and pretty. :)
• What else? Is that it? There feels like there's so much more. Cursed stories *shakes fist*
• And then there's the sequel that I'll probably never write
• And I never finished Through My Eyes. I can't bring myself to it >.<

Really? How much room has this taken up? A lot? ^ - ^'' sorry. I really don't want to go to bed. I want to stay up and write and then just throw away that evil test tomorrow.

Evil test..

Let's see. I'm still not dressed. I've gone to bed not dressed or when I'm home alone I'll walk around naked. That might be one of the reasons I'm never getting married.

Never getting married. Ever ever. I'm going to be a Latin teacher and then at night I'll write. And I'll have a piano for when Caleb-kun comes to visit and he'll play for me and I'll write for him. Happiness. Never getting married. I'll have two dogs and children -- of course, they'll be made out of paper and ink. :)

I think if I knew I was going to die, I'd want someone to inject ink into my blood. If it were up to me, I'd get my skin turned into paper and blood mixed with ink and have probably Daytime Lullaby printed on it. I'd haunt that thing like no shit.

Well that was creepy AND morbid.

If I ever donated an organ I'd want the doctors to also send a copy of one of my books. "Hey, you got a liver. It's actually the liver of this fantastic writer!! Here's one of her books!" It's cocky, but fuck, it's my liver.

Still not dressed. Kinda cold. And it's nearly 11. I just freaked out because I was afraid I wouldn't get my homework done. Then I remembered the evil test.

To be made out of paper and ink. I think I'd envy my "children". Maybe in a stroke of madness I'd burn them all.

Now I'm just being scary.

This is really long at this point. And I'm rambling. And I think Garett's sleepy.

And I can't even wake him up by turning him on. That's what I do with all of my guy friends, wake them up that way. *laughs lightly* Why am I, a ho, dating such a non-sexual person!? Will it be good for me? Probably.

Who knows.

It's Jekka's birthday soon. I'm all excited. I need to buy her more gifts.. I may do that on Thursday. *shrugs*

God I love her.

Lord, help me out tomorrow, okay? this test won't be easy. And they probably won't even let me listen to music, which is depressing. I'll listen to the Moonlight Sonata tomorrow though, that'll help me.

I love the moon too. Where is she tonight? I wish she'd dance for me.

I'll dance for her instead. Sleep well, beautiful moon, rest yourself. Your little nymph will dance instead. <3